My MockingJay
by ThePerksOfReadingBooks
Summary: This is a story I wrote in Peeta's point of view. It shows the same events as The hunger games, but also tells the story of when Peeta left Katniss in the games, and goes into his background. This is my first Fanfiction, so enjoy and leave some feedback!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"Peeta…." A soft delicate songbird voice says. "Peeta..." it repeats.

I open my eyes. Katniss's voice isn't in my room. Just in my dreams. I sigh. How could I even think she was saying my name? I bet she doesn't even know my name. I wish she did. I know her's; it's in my head consecutively. It's such a beautiful name, and I'm praying that Effie doesn't say it today. The reaping is the one day that every child fears more than anything. The one day everybody in every district worries about. 2 children are chosen from each if the 12 districts, taken to the capitol and made to participate in a live TV show called the hunger games. Our district never wins, and every year more parents are walking round the district lost after watching their children die on our rubbish TV screens.

My mother always says on reaping day that if we get picked she wouldn't know what to do. But I just don't know what I'd do if Katniss was chosen.

My mother gives me a clean shirt and a pair of black trousers. I put them on, but my mind was on 1 thing and 1 thing only. All I hear in my head is Katniss's voice. Her singing, her speaking, whatever she says it just makes me feel better to hear her voice.

Every body is at the reaping. With a population of 8,000 districts 12 can fit into the place where they call the names out. I line up with the other 16 year old boys.

I guess I'm lucky, being only 16, and my parents being bakers, if we were short of food, we eat the leftovers and burnt bit of the bakery so my name hasn't had to have been entered again. 5 out of thousands is barely anything.

Then I spot her. She's wearing a dress that suits her. She's wearing her hair up and it looks stunning. To me she simply stands out against the crowd of other girls around. I can tell by the worried look on her face that she's nervous. But then I bet anything that she's nervous about her little sister. Or Gale. Gale. Rumour has it them two are a couple, and sneak off into the woods together to spend some alone time with each other. I want to believe it's not true, but they go into the hob all the time together, and

Gale sells squirrels that she shots with a bow and arrow to my father in exchange for bread. He sold one to him this morning to my dad. He exchanged it for a really good piece of bread. He must have been feeling generous. Everyone knows he's in the reaping many, many times. My father says the odds aren't really in his favour. A very very small part of me wishes he'd get chosen, just so he'd be away from Katniss. But most of me wants him to be okay, so that Katniss will be happy. That's everything that I want, for Katniss to be happy. I hardly see her smile anymore, since her father died. It was a horrible accident in the mines that make district 12 useful to the capitol. I wanted to help her after he father died, so much. To hold her and tell her it would be okay, tell her I was there for her whatever she needed. But I couldn't, it never felt right- this was a time that should be spent with her family. Her sister must have been devastated, and her mother too. My father wanted to marry her mother. But she ran off with Katniss's father instead, because according to my dad, he could sing like nothing anyone had ever heard before. I get that feeling when Katniss starts singing. Her voice is hypnotising, like a singing bird, and when she sings my whole world just stops- nothing matters, all my worries, fears just fade away. She makes it better, everything is better when she sings. That's why when I'm sad I hear her voice, it makes it better. On the reaping day, until the moment the girl tribute is picked, it's all I hear. I hate the fact I can't volunteer for her, and that every year my fear for her being picked gets worse. Effie's been talking for a long time now. It's so warm, the sun is beating down, and all I can hear is Katniss's voice.

"Peeta…"

The video of district 13 is showing. The same mockingjay is there, and I know it's almost time to pick out the girls name.

"Peeta…"

"Ladies first" Effie announces, in the same shrill voice she uses every year.

"Peeta…"

Her hand hovers over the bowl, and finally she picks up a name slip.

Not Katniss….

Not Katniss….

Anyone but Katniss…

"Primrose Everdeen"

No.

No.

Anyone but Katniss or her.

Anyone but Katniss or her sister.

She's 12.

Her names in there once.

I knows what's going to happen, no please don't do it. I start to shuffle, I can hear her yelling.

"I volunteer! I volunteer as tribute"

No.

Please.

No.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Lovely!" says Effie Trinket. "But I believe there's a small matter of introducing  
the reaping winner and then asking for volunteers, and if one does come forth then  
we, um . . ." she trails off.

I have to move, to get to Katniss. She can't go. No. I have to move, but my body won't budge. I can't volunteer I feel so useless. I need to volunteer, to keep her away from Effie. Why can't I volunteer?

But I can volunteer for the boys. It's easy, no one ever volunteers. I'll just volunteer. But my mother and my father. And my brothers. They would be so hurt, and everyone would always wonder why I did it….

Oh Katniss what should I do?

Times going to quickly. The mayor is talking and Prim is yelling. I see Gale has lifted  
Prim off the ground and she's fighting in his arms. "Up you go, Catnip," He says to Katniss. Catnip? Wait no! Don't tell her to go! Make her stay. Make her be safe. Please just let her be safe. But she's walking; I can't understand why how she's walking.

"Well, bravo!" smiles Effie Trinket. "That's the spirit of the Games!" She can't be happy to see a child volunteer for death?

"What's your name?"

"Katniss Everdeen," I hear her say. I can't let this happen. I look around. I can't see Gale or Prim- I think he carried her away. My brain just isn't working.

I bet my buttons that was your sister. Don't want her to steal all the glory, do  
we? Come on, everybody! Let's give a big round of applause to our newest  
tribute!" says Effie Trinket.

It's not surprising nobody claps. Tribute isn't a word that is celebrated in our district like it is in other districts. In the champion districts, it doesn't really matter who gets chosen in the reaping, because the strongest children are trained there whole lives for the moment when they can volunteer for the games. In our district, we're only ever had 1 victor so volunteers don't exist because most people just accept the fact that there brothers or sisters, friends or children are going to die- because we don't really have that much choice. We're district 12, so most of our people die pretty quickly.

But then something odd happens. Everybody knows what Katniss has done after her father died. Her father was well loved and nearly everybody knew him, so after he died many people kept talking about his family. People began to notice the mother never being seen, and Katniss and Prim getting thinner- so people rightly assumed she wasn't really fit for providing for her family. And after a while, we all saw Katniss beginning to go around selling food to everyone. Everybody knows she practically brought her family back from the dead so she is so well respected in our district.

Almost every member of the crowd touches the 3 middle fingers of their left hand to their lips and holds it out to her. This is a rare sign used. It means thanks, it means good-bye to someone you love.

But I don't do it.

I can't say goodbye to her.

I won't say goodbye to her.

I would have nothing left.

See the thing is nobody would understand how I cam be in love with someone I've don't really know. But I do know her, and I love her in a way that is so strong I could be apart from her for 100 years, and although I'd never want to be, the memory of her is so incredible that I would never stop loving her. I know she is so amazing, everything about her shines so brightly like its fire, but not a burning fire – just an illuminating bright light. She's just….indescribable. And I've heard her singing and she's so soulful, and real. She's nothing like any girl in this district. I know she's unique, completely her own person. And because of this, I think I'll love her forever.

Haymitch suddenly comes stumbling across the stage to congratulate me. "Look at her. Look at this one!" he shouts, putting his arm around her shoulders. "I like her!" he slurs "Lots of . . . "He pauses for a little "Spunk!" he says happily. "More than you!" He begins to walk to the front of the stage. "More than you!" he shouts. He's saying to a camera. Who's he speaking to? Surely he's not talking to the Capitol?

Then he tumbles off the stage and knocks himself unconscious. Stupid moron.

Every camera is focused on him, and almost every single pair of eyes in the audience. But not mine. I can't seem to tear my eyes away from Katniss. She looks so small up on the stage. I can tell just from looking at her, she's afraid. I can't believe she's not crying or even looking a little sad. It just reminds me how strong she is.

Haymitch is taken away on a stretcher, when Effie begins to speak again" What an exciting day!" she grins. "But more excitement to come! It's time to choose our boy tribute!" She grabs a slip, and I realise I have to make up my mind pretty quickly.

Volunteer and die or See her killed.

Surprisingly that seems quite an easy choice.

"Peeta Mellark."

Peeta Mellark. Peeta Mellark. Peeta Mellark.

That's me. My name. I am Peeta Mellark. Peeta Mellark.

5 in thousands of slips, my name is the one that gets selected. The odds are really messed up today- first Prim, then me.

Oh right. Walk. Walk Peeta, everyone's looking, including Katniss I think. Don't look at her… WALK!

I walk to the stage. I can't believe they called my name. When I get to the stage, Effie asks for volunteers. I'm not even surprised when they aren't any


	3. Chapter 3

I'm taken to an odd room. It's really big with velvet sofas. Very rich, just like the capitol. This is the place where tributes say goodbye to their family. I wonder what my parents will say. I doubt that they'll try and tell me I'll win. They'll say their goodbyes I expect. Good. I think. I won't bother telling them I don't plan on coming back. I have to protect her.

My dad enters first, he looks small, compared to his normal, and broad- shouldered strong self. With his blonde hair, people say we look similar. I guess we do.

My mum enters next, looking like normal. She doesn't like to show emotion. Over 17 years of living with just men, maybe she's lost most of her emotional side. I've never been her favourite, so I wonder who she feels about me being selected. Is she sad? Or is she just glad it wasn't one of my other brothers? It's hard to tell with her. I don't remember the last time she told me she loved me. Maybe I'll hear those words today. Surely today of all days I deserve to hear them?

"Hello son" whisperers Dad "How are you?"

"As good as I can be under the circumstances. Thanks" I reply. No point in lying to them, this is very likely the conversation they'll remember me by. I will be as honest as possible, even if they won't know the full truth.

I turn to face my mother "Hello Mother" I say. What else is there to say to a woman who has never been truly happy with anything I've ever done, or many of the choices I've made?

"Hello" a small response. Was I even hoping for more than that? Maybe a few more words for her son who's going to an arena to fight to the death?

"Find weapons, get to shelter. Don't put yourself in any unnecessary risky situations." my father suddenly breaks the tension. He's offering me advice on how to win. Does he really think I can?

"Um... thank you." I say, I'm not grateful of the advice as much as I'm grateful for him actually acknowledging the fact that I'm going to the Hunger Games. Mum has barley looked at me.

A peacekeeper looks in to us. I begin to feel tears beginning to come to my eyes. I known our time is really up. I really can't believe I have to say goodbye to them. At this point I don't know if I could have done this as a volunteer.

"2 minutes left" the peacekeeper says. 2 minutes left the people who have raised me, and made me into the person I am today.

"Mum...Dad. I want to say..." I begin but my dad stops me.

"You don't need to say anything my boy. We know how you feel. Just let's spend the next few minutes we have before you go... together. Just the 3 of us, okay?"

"Okay" I say. My Mother gives a small nod. My dad pulls us both into a tight hug. This kind of intimacy is rare in our house, and I don't think any of us are particularly comfortable with it. But like dad said, it's important to spend this time as a sort of family, even if we aren't a really close one, and even if we haven't been before.

Still the tears in my eyes drop down to my cheeks, because after all of this I know I'll never see them again, and after 17 years, it does make me sad.

I wonder how Katniss is dealing with this? Her mum ad sister will say goodbye, and possibly Gale too. It's kinda hard to get mad at the fact he'll be probably with her know, telling her how to win or maybe tips on how to kill me with the least effort possible.

I break away the hug, just wanting to say something, anything. A goodbye or just…anything.

"I love you. You know that right?" I manage to mutter.

"We know" says Mother, giving me eye contact for the first time since they entered the room.

"And we love you too" says Dad. He gives me the ghost of a smile; faint but still there.

"Sorry times up" says the peacekeeper, re-entering the room. They begin to walk out of the room, but my mum stops suddenly, like she's just remembered something she had to say.

"Hey, you never know- our district might have a winner this year..." she says, before continuing to walk out, then as she exits, her voice is barley audible when she whispers " she's a fighter that one."

She's.

_She's._

_As in Katniss?_

My mother doesn't think I'll win, but she think Katniss will?

Maybe my mother's right. Katniss, if anything is a known fighter, and she'll definitely be trying to win it for Prim.

Will she even need my help? Or will she turn into a killer like some kids do, and maybe murder me? I can't imagine Katniss as a killer. I know she hunts animals, but that's completely different. I don't think Katniss could kill someone in cold blood, just to get some extra food or even for Prim, it's just not the kind of person she is.

But the Hunger games are different. It makes people into killers. It takes scared little children and makes them into murderers.

If I die, I don't want to die trying to kill anyone. I will die as the Peeta I am today, the Peeta I was yesterday and the person I was born as- Not the Capitols weapon, but as me.

Katniss and I are taken to a train that will take us to the Capitol. We stand near each other while Cameras are shoved in our faces. I smile, knowing full well potential sponsors will see these pictures, Smiles = sponsors. But I'm more focused on the fact Katniss and I are next to each other, and after thinking about it I realise the smiles I'm showing for the camera's are not so much for the photographs but a little for the fact we're so close.

If I'm going to die in a few weeks, I want to spend as much time with Katniss as possible. I will not die without her knowing exactly how I feel about her.

The train ride is quiet. We each have our own chambers, which are really fancy- nothing like at home. Being the baker's son, people always assume that we're rich, but the truth is, we have a really hard time making any money for us. We have as little as the next person, but the only difference is our family has a small shop, that means we don't always starve.

The one thing that surprises me is the fact they have showers. I've never had a shower before. It's warm, but it's a bit weird.

Effie calls me into supper after I'm dressed and in my way I see Haymitch looking completely off his head, heading for his room. He must be going for a nap or something. I sit at the table, it's already set and Effie mutters something about how rude Katniss is for not being here, when she clearly told us supper was at 8. I look at the clock. 8:02. I get the feeling Effie is very strict.

"Maybe she's still in the shower" I suggest, not liking hearing her say the slightest bad thing about Katniss. Bad idea. Katniss in a towel after a shower. Drat. I wouldn't mind seeing that. I don't know what's wrong with me. Maybe being so near to Katniss is doing odd things to my mind.

"Well that simply won't do. I'll go fetch her." Snaps Effie. After a quick adjustment of her wig that she thinks I don't see, she struts off down the corridor.

A few minutes later, she comes in again, this time Katniss is right behind her. She's wearing a sort of dark green top, and trousers- nothing like what she was wearing before. A mockingjay pin stands out, shining brightly on her. I wonder if it's her token from home.

She takes the seat next to Effie, just as Effie notices Haymitch's absence.

"Where's Haymitch?" Effie says happily. Probably happy he's not here.

I remember seeing him earlier "last time I saw him, he was going to take a nap." I say, because I don't really want him here, and telling Effie he's awake might make her go get him.

"Well it's been an exhausting day" says Effie. She doesn't head off to fetch him.

The food is amazing, I've never tasted anything so amazing, but the whole time my eyes are fixed on Katniss. She eats so delicately, but at the same time like she's actually worried she may never eat again. I've never really given it much thought, but I suppose some nights she might not eat at all. She would definitely give anything extra to Prim, even if she went hungry herself.

"At least you two have decent manners; the pair last year ate everything with their hands like a couple of scavenges. It completely upset my digestion." Effie says. She must know how starving everyone is in district 12? The couple last year were so bony they looked like they would collapse after a walk up onto the stage. The capitols are never short of food I bet.

I smirk when I notice Katniss beginning to eat with her hands.

After the meal I feel a bit ill. That food was very rich and maybe I shouldn't have eaten so much of it. I glance at Katniss. She's looking at me. I really hope she hasn't noticed that I'm looking a bit sick. Please say she won't notice.

We're led into a cabin, and we begin to walk the different Reapings, to look at the people we'll be facing. Some will be a big threat to me if I plan to keep Katniss alive. A massive lad from district 2 and another from district 12. I notice Katniss looks so sad when she sees a 12 year old girl from 11 being chosen. I wonder if it's because she knows it's her next. I don't watch the screen when our district is shown; I watch Katniss' face as she looks at her little sister cling to Gale. She shows no emotion. That surprises me, but maybe she just wants to practise showing no feeling for when she's around the other contestants. Effie snaps me out of my little thought trance.

"Your mentor has a lot to learn about presentation and a lot about televised behaviour."

I laugh out of the pure awkwardness of it all. Surely she doesn't think it's down to behaviour?

"He _was drunk,_he's drunk every year._"_I say.

"Every day" says Katniss, and she smirks. Did Katniss Everdeen just make a small joke? Wow.

Effie moans on at us about how He's are mentor and how he'll help us in the games, then just to prove her point all most, Haymitch walks in, says something I don't hear very well, vomits then collapses onto the floor.

_Lovely._


	4. Chapter 4

It takes a while for Katniss and I to react to the sight of Haymitch collapsed in his own vomit.

I look at Katniss and am surprised to see her looking back at me. Her eyes shine so beautifully in this light.

I figure Katniss probably doesn't want to clean Haymitch up, so I grab him and am surprised again when she goes to help me.

"I tripped?" mutters Haymitch when we each take an arm and hoist him up. "Smells bad"

We know, I think, we can smell it too.

He when smears vomit onto his face trying to wipe him nose and I realise he definitely needs a bath.

"Let's get you to your room" I say "Clean you up a bit"

We practically carry Haymitch to his bathroom, then Katniss and I place him in the bathtub and turn on the shower. I notice Katniss's face as she realises we'll have to deal with him as he's so out of it.

"Its okay" I say to Katniss (Wow! Words are actually coming out of my mouth!) "I'll take it from here". Maybe if I can sober him up I can talk to him about my plan when I'm in the games. He's pretty useless but he is our mentor, he has to give me advice.

"All right" says Katniss. Her voice is even more beautiful in real life. It's got a bit more of an edge but its real, from her own mouth. "I'll send one of the Capitol people to help you"

I respond quickly "No. I don't want them". They give me the creeps. She nods at me, and then leaves briskly. I wonder if the smell is getting to her.

The bath is filling up pretty quickly as a turn back to face Haymitch. He's staring at me. It's slightly unnerving. But I shake it off and stop the shower from running. He takes his trousers and shirt off and starts to move around in the water. He's still looking at me, so I get the shower and wash out his hair. After I'm done, his silence is really uncomfortable and I think Haymitch is sobered up enough to remember this conversation so I should probably tell him my plan.

"Listen Haymitch I wanted to talk to you abo-"

Haymitch interrupts me "So you're into the brunette eh?" he says the first words I've ever heard him say without slurring.

"Her name is Katniss" I snap. He should show her some more respect, and calling her the brunette is horrid. I then realise he figured it out. "How'd you know?" I ask.

He chuckles. "Come on, I may be a bit drunk,"_** A**__** bit?**_ "But I do know how a boy looks at a girl when he's in love. And I can see it when you spoke to her."

Wow. I did not know I was that obvious. Oh god! Maybe Katniss knows it. Maybe she sees it too. I mean, Haymitch probably consumes as much alcohol in one day then most of our district does in a year. If Katniss knows and didn't say anything, it means she definitely doesn't love me. I mean, I don't kid myself thinking she does, I know she's got Gale, but it would have been nice to know if I had decided on telling her, she would at least talk to me or something.

"Relax stupid" says Haymitch "If you haven't told her yet then she doesn't know"

"How do you know?" I ask. Again he chuckles "She keeps looking at you. Just at odd moments. Like she's trying to figure you out or something. Trying to figure out who you are"

Who I am.

That's hard enough for me to know, let alone her to figure out.

There's nothing special about me, I'm just...Peeta.

My name is Peeta Mellark.

I live in District 12.

I am 16 years old.

I draw and paint for fun.

I bake.

I am in love with Katniss Everdeen.

My whole life this is how I've seen myself. The simple bakers' son who likes to do artwork. There's no more to my story. That's it. If I did grow up I would have to carry on my father's bakery and continue to live in district 12. All that would have changed if I grew up is my age. I don't think even time could change the fact I'm in love with Katniss. Seems weird now, last week I could have seen my whole future. Now all I can see if the games. And Katniss.

Katniss can't figure out anything more about me. There is nothing left to figure out or understand except those 6 facts. I hope by the time we get to the games she'll know all 6.

I envy Katniss. She has so much about her, she's so special, I could list millions of things about her, things that make her so amazing, even if I can only list a few about myself.

"Hello? Earth to Blondie!" says Haymitch.

"Oh yeah. Sorry. I wanted to talk to you." I say, snapped back into reality.

"About the girl?"

"_Katniss._" I say through my teeth. "I don't want any sponsors."

"What makes you think you'll get any?" Haymitch says back, completely unfazed by my request.

"I don't but I just don't you to try and get me any. Focus all your effort on getting Katniss sponsors. She's small, quick, good with a bow and fierce, a few sponsors should select her if you convince them" I reply

"And why should I do that?" says Haymitch. I think about it. What can I give him? Bread? He practically lives on booze, and the capitol makes sure he's looked after and rich. Then I realise exactly what I can promise him.

"Freedom" I smirk at him. He can't refuse this.

"Freedom?"

"Together we can make sure she has amazing odds at winning this game. She wins, you're free to live your life rotting away, drinking yourself into an early grave in district 12, while she's tutoring all the tributes for years to come."

Haymitch seems to think this over in his head. "Tempting" he says.

"Look I don't intend to come out of these games alive. I plan on protecting her at all costs, making sure she'll win. I can and will do it without you, I just think it'll be easier on everyone if you'll help"

I don't recognise the voice that's almost shouting at Haymitch. But I'm angry. Angry at him for not being as willing as I hoped with my plans. Angry he figured out the fact I'm in love with Katniss and she hasn't. Angry at her for being with Gale when I'm prepared to die for her. Angry at the fact she still loves him even though he didn't volunteer to protect her in the games. Angry I'm going to have to die on television that thousands of people with be watching, including my family. At Effie for selecting Prim. Angry at the games. Angry at the capitol. Just… Angry.

Haymitch looks at me.

"Well,at least we know you have some fight in you" he sneers.

"I'll let you think about it." I snap, and storm out of the bathroom.

I jump into my bed. I'm so tired.

_Why can't this just be a dream?_

_Why can't I wake up and this all be over?_

"Up, up, up! It's going to be a big, big, big day!" shrieks Effie, as light begins to pour in through the window. I'm so tired.

I throw on the first set of clothes I come across. The ones I was wearing yesterday. I'm not really bothered about what I look like.

Then I remember I'll be spending time with Katniss today so I brush my hair.

I walk into the dining car and take the furthest seat away from Effie as possible because I do want my hearing in tact when the games begin.

Effie hands me a mug of something dark. I sniff it. It smells like chocolate. We use chocolate very, very rarely in the bakery. Only peacekeepers or the mayor can afford to buy anything with it in though.

"It's called hot chocolate" says Effie. I take a sip. It's still very hot but it's really sweet and it's different from water and juices we have at home, I gulp it down. It burns my entire mouth and throat, and Effie takes my mug and refills it.

Haymitch walks in, and takes the seat next to me. I don't blame him, I wouldn't want to sit next to Effie this early, but it does mean Katniss will have to sit next to her. And she won't sit next to me.

Haymitch looks at me. And says "I thought and about your little proposal last night."

"And?" I say, picking up a roll and beginning to eat, like it's no big deal

"Fine, I'll do it, but we'll talk about it in more detail later." He says.

**YES! **With Haymitch helping me, it'll give Katniss a really good shot at winning.

Then Katniss walks in and I practically choke on the roll I'm eating.

_Did she hear?_

If she did she seems unaffected by it.

Effie hands her a mug of hot chocolate and Katniss looks into the mug with a puzzled look on her face, probably not like the one I had on when I first saw the drink.

"They call it hot chocolate" I say."It's good"

I sound like a absolute _moron._

She does take a sip of it though, and she gulps the rest down just like I did. If only I knew she liked chocolate. I would have taken some of the expensive chocolate pieces that didn't sell at the bakery and left them for her and Prim.

_Why didn't I think of that before now?_

I'm beginning to realise there's a lot of things I should have done before now.

I'm still eating my roll, but I can't take my eyes off Katniss. She's still wearing her clothes from yesterday like me and her braid is the same but strands of hair have escaped and are now framing her face perfectly. Even if angels were surrounding our table right now, with big feathered wings and golden locks of hair, Katniss would still be the most beautiful thing in this room. In every room.

I'm surprised when I feel the fact that my roll is wet. I look down. I've dipped it in hot chocolate. It tastes disgusting.

I'm about to spit it out but I notice Katniss is looking at me. What on earth would it look like if I spat it out?

So I ignore my taste buds, and swallow another mouthful of the slush.

_Yuck._

As soon as Katniss looks away, I put the soggy roll to the side and begin eating the other food that has been placed in front of us. It all looks amazing.

I only eat a bit though, after last night I don't think I would ever want to eat again. Haymitch has barley touched his, and Effie looks like she only ate a small amount. Katniss has stopped eating too.

"So your supposed to give us advice" says Katniss to Haymitch. So I guess she didn't notice he's already drunk.

"Here's some advice"says Haymitch "Stay alive!"then he bursts out laughing.

Did he think this was funny?

Katniss' life is in danger!

There is nothing funny about it!

I look at Katniss and she looks at me too. How dare he think the fact she could die is funny!

I'm so mad and I just want him to stop laughing so I lash out.

"That's very funny" I say, then I knock the glass of wine out of his hand. He does look surprised. So does Katniss. "Only not to us"

He has to know after last night I will fight for Katniss. I am not weak, I'll get angry if it will help her.

I was definitely **not** expecting Haymitch to punch me in my face.

He hits good for someone who's off his face 24/7.

I have to remember he did win the Games once.

When Haymitch goes to get more alcohol, I'm surprised again at the fact Katniss plunges a knife between his fingers and the bottles.

"Well what's this?" says Haymitch "Did I actually get a pair of fighters this year?"

My jaw is starting to ache so I take this moment to grab some ice from breakfast and go to place it where he hit me.

"No" says Haymitch, stopping me from putting it on "Let the bruise show. The audience will think you've mixed up with another tribute before you've even made it to the arena."

"That's against the rules."I say bitterly.

"Only if they catch you. That bruise will say you fought, you weren't caught,even better" He makes me really angry, maybe because he's a content reminder of the Capitol, the Games and what it turns people into, but I least I know he's got some fight left in him. That will help us in the games. He turns to Katniss

"Can you hit anything with that knife besides a table?"

Katniss yanks it out of the table and throws the knife at the wall. It hits in-between two seams. I'm puzzled. I didn't know Katniss can throw knives. I know she's incredible with a bow and arrow, my father tells me that when she sells us meat.

Haymitch then continues to strike a deal I'm not really listening too. I only agree because I know it'll strike suspicion with Katniss if I don't. The only good piece of advice he gives us is to do whatever the hell are stylists tell us. Probably make us look ridiculous.

The only deal I'm interested in with Haymitch is the one we are supposed to be talking about later.

The train ride is silent for then on out, but when we pull up to the station I can't help but join Katniss to view the Capitol. This is so rare- that someone from district 12 to see the capitol.

Then I notice people from the station smiling and watching and cheering us. Well cheering our deaths maybe. There's this really small child, she can't be much older than 5 waving at me. So I wave back. She probably doesn't even know who she's waving to. I wonder if her parents let her watch the games.

I then start to wave at the rest of the crowd. It's what I've seen different tributes do over the years of watching the games.

I see Katniss is looking at me "What?" I say "One of them could be rich."

She looks at me like she actually hates me at that point.

I have to remember the reason I'm doing this is for her, and soon she'll know that too.


	5. Chapter 5

I'm taken to the remake centre but being a boy, there's not much they can do. They make me take a long bath then scrub me with this gritty stuff everywhere, then they put some sticky stuff on my face- it's supposed to make me look younger and a bit more innocent. They cut my nails, clean them then style them and they trim my hair and pluck my eye brows.

_All I can say is ouch._

_I hate to think what they're doing to Katniss. _

"We'll send your stylist in now" says one of the pep team. There all very nice, but could do with some general people skills lessons. I've lost count of the times since I've got here they've accidentally insulted me.

Strangely a young girl, with blonde hair in some kind of crown above her head and very light blue eyes walks in. Her outfit is nice but very elaborate. It seems to be a blue dress, the same colour of her eyes, with white silk made into these big bushy clumps behind her back. Then I get it. She's supposed to be an angel. The hair is her halo, and the silk her wings. It's very beautiful, if a bit excessive but she seems very happy. She gives me a huge smile, showing perfect white gleaming teeth.

"Well hello handsome! You're looking so great! I knew you would! Those guys are so fantastic don't you agree!" I open my mouth to answer but she keeps going. " My names Portia, I'm your stylist!..." She's looking at me. Oh right.

"Peeta. Peeta Mellark" I say

"Well hello Peeta, Peeta Mellark!" she laughs so much, I'm scared she'll forget to breath. I let out a giggle. She seems generally quite nice, if a bit stupid like the prep team. But she's very happy and going into the games, happiness will be limited so it might be nice to have someone like her around.

"So what are you going to do to me?" I ask. I'm very worried at what she's going to make me look like.

"Well Cinna and I have been talking and he has the most perfect idea!" she squeals.

"And that is?" I'm still very worried.

One year the people were naked and completely covered in this kind of black stuff. Like ash.

"I think your going to be excited!"

Oh lord we're going to be naked

Thousands of people are going to see me naked.

Even worse, Katniss will see me naked.

Portia squeals again and pulls out this black outfit. It's a bit ugly, but it's clothes! She then pulls out this cape that looks like the colours of fire. Not very realistic but it's the effect that's important.

"There's a big surprise for you when you put it on!" says Portia, and I slip into my outfit.

"your going to be on fire!" suddenly Portia shouts at me "oops! I wasn't going to tell you yet. Anyway Cinna and I are going to set your cape on fire!"

_Fire?_

_**Fire?**_

"I'll be killed! Your crazy!" I almost shout to Portia. I don't want to die before I'm even in the arena.

"Fake fire silly! It'll look real but it can't burn you." she laughs, like I'm so stupid for not getting that they're only going to_ pretend _to light me on fire! Fire is fire!

I don't speak another word until we go to meet up with Cinna and Katniss.

Katniss looks spectacular. I mean I've never seen her so... fierce, so powerful. Her outfit is identical almost, but on her it almost looks like she's on fire. She is the girl on fire. I am just the boy from district 12 next to her.

We're both taken down to the bottom floor of the remake centre, where are chariots await. There drawn by horses, and I notice ours our black like the night. Katniss and I step up onto our chariot.

"what do you think?" Katniss suddenly whispers to me, as our quite obviously crazy stylists rearrange our capes, probably discussing the best way to _set us on fire._ "about the fire?"

"I'll rip off your cape if you rip off mine" I say. Even though Katniss is next to me and talking to me, I'm still completely freaked at the fact we're going to be set on fire.

_What if she gets hurt?_

"Deal" she says. She sounds worried too " I know we promised Haymitch we'd do exactly what they said, but I don't think he considered this angle.

"Where is Haymitch, anyway? Isn't he supposed to protect us from this kind of thing?" I say, trying to disguise the fact I'm so worried.

"With all the alcohol in him, it's probably not advisable to have him round an open flame." she reply's.

Maybe it's because we're both really worried about the whole fire thing, but we're both laughing. I love the way she laughs.

We stop when we hear the opening music and the chariots start to roll out.

One by one each of the other district Chariots roll out, when district 11 gets going Cinna steps us to us

"Here we go" he says then quickly lights our capes on fire. Katniss and I gasp, waiting for the burning to happen but all that seems to happen is a bit of heat and some kind of tingling feeling. Then Cinna climbs up to look at us when sets our head-dresses on fire. "It works" he says.

He thought it wouldn't work?

They've never tested it before?

And they used it on us?

"Remember; heads high. Smilies. They're going to love you!" Cinna says before getting off the chariot.

When we set off, the music is so loud I don't see hear what Cinna shouts at us. Then he gestures and shouts again.

He wants me to hold Katniss' hand.

On live T.V.

Katniss' hand.

I don't think I was this afraid even at the reaping.

"What's he saying?" asks Katniss. I look at her. She's stunning. Absolutely stunning. Her face is lit up in the twilight darkness due to the flames behind her. Her long hair though tied up gleams. Her skin looks so soft and her eyes sparkle like gems. She's never looked more... illuminating. She looks so nervous. She's got a fake smile on. I've never thought about it until now but Katniss is bound to think she can't win. She must be so scared. Not for herself, she's so utterly unselfish she'll be scared for Prim and her mother. I look at her hand. Then back at her. She's looking at me waiting for an answer.

"I think he said for us to hold hands" I manage to say. I quickly grab her hand and feel like I'm actually on fire for a moment. Her hand just fits into mine, it's like we were made to hold hands. I feel so..so... alive. But it's nothing to do with the games or the people or the music.

This will not be the last time I hold her hand I promise myself.

We look at Cinna and he signals this is what he was saying.

We go into the city, and I'm grinning my head off. It's not fake. I just can't stop smiling at the fact Katniss is holding my hand.

Everyone is staring at us. The fire catches every ones eye I guess. So does Katniss. She looks so incredible. I wonder if she knows it? I want to tell her bit the time does not seem appropriate. She does seem to be enjoying herself though. She's even started blowing kisses at the crowd.

I almost wished I was in the crowd at this point, but I was holding her hand.

One that Gale had probably held hundreds of times.

Maybe he'd even kissed her. It's almost definite, she's 16 and he's Gale's not here now. I am. I am here supporting her, prepared to die for her and he's at home watching. He did nothing when she was reaped. I was going to volunteer, I'm sure of it. Surely the fact I'm here and he's not should count for something?

I wonder what people are thinking at home?

Are they sad, happy, or plain surprised we're on fire?

Surprised probably.

I know I was.

We carry on, and I feel all the eyes on Katniss and I. We catch everyone's attention and it makes me feel confident Katniss will get some sponsors. She's not a face, or a name you'd forget quickly now.

This is good, sponsors may be heartless and evil, but they do want there tribute to win.

When we get into the town centre, Katniss grip on my hand loosens. My hands killing me, my blood isn't getting to it because she's been holding it so tightly. But without her fingers in mine, my hand feels cold, heavy and useless.

I don't want to let her go.

I have to let go of her in the games though.

"No, don't let go of me!" it's hard to miss the urgency in my voice.

I can't let her go yet.

"Please." I'm begging now. I tighten my grip on her fingers, though I'm very careful not to hurt her. " I might fall out of this thing"

That is possibly the worst excuse anyone has ever said.

To anyone.

About anything.

I'm an idiot.

"Ok" she says.

Aright, I'm also a deaf idiot, there is no way she just agreed to that. But she keeps holding on. She must be a bit scared too.

We come to a halt around the presidents mansion (typical he has a mansion when most of the district have what they call a shed as a house.) he begins to talk about the games, as the cameras show the faces of the tributes. Katniss and I have way more time on the screen then anyone else. It's fantastic. We're then taken back to the training centre and all of the prep team run at us and are saying praise. They all look very happy. I am in till Katniss lets go of my hand. I massage it, because she was holding on to me pretty dam tight, but I miss the leave of her fingers in mine and the warmth of her hand already.

Our fiery bit of clothing have been taken off and there lying in the corner. I need to think of something to say.

" Thanks for keeping hold of me. I was getting a little shaky there"

Why?

Why do I let words come out of my mouth?

It just makes me seem like a complete idiot.

"it didn't show. I'm sure no one noticed" she tells me. Is she just ignoring the fact I'm a moron, or she's just nice to everyone.

"I'm sure they didn't notice anything but you." completely true. "you should wear flames more often . They suit you." this is risky, but I want her to know I think she's absolutely beautiful.

Then she does something completely unexpected.

She smiles, that warm lovely smile I knew she has, then comes up to me and kisses my cheek.

Katniss kissed my cheek.

Katniss.

Why are my dreams and nightmares coming true at the same time?


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

We were taken to the training centre where we are going to live for the next few weeks. Each district has its own floor and because we're district 12 we get the top floor. We got to ride in this amazing elevator; it was glass and showed us the Capitol. I loved the look on Katniss' face when she rode in it, she looked so happy. I would have ridden in that elevator all day just to see her face.

I get ready for dinner and dress carefully. After that kiss from Katniss my brain is slightly fuzzy and for some reason I want to make a good impression from now on with her. I looked like an idiot on the carriage and I don't want her to think that's me normally.

When I head down to the dining room Katniss isn't there but Portia, Cinna and Effie are. They take me to the balcony. The view is so beautiful. But when Katniss arrived my attention was completely on here. She looks incredible.

We sit down at the dinner table and Haymitch joined us just as the dinner was being served. He seems pretty sober which is good because we're discussing tactics at dinner tonight. Everyone's very happy about our opening ceremony. Effie and Haymitch seem to be getting along nicely and everyone's quite friendly.

"That's the last thing I wa — oh! I know you!" Katniss suddenly says. I turn to face her and she's talking to one of our servers. Effie explained them to me earlier. The servers are classed as traitors in the Capitol's eyes, so they cut out there tongues as a punishment. The only way Katniss would know this girl is if she was a traitor from district 12, and it's not very common. It's bad to know an Avox. What is Katniss doing?

"Don't be ridiculous, Katniss. How could you possibly know an Avox?" snaps  
Effie. "The very thought."

"What's an Avox" Katniss asks. Haymitch and Effie begin to explain what an Avox is to her, but I'm still very confused. I don't understand where Katniss would know the girl from. I have no idea where she's from, and who ever knows an Avox is normally classed as a traitor too in the Capitols eyes. Some get whipped, some killed others become an Avox too. Why does Katniss think she knows this little girl? Would she be classed as a traitor? She could be treated really badly in the games.

"No, I guess not, I just —" she stammers.

What do I do?

I snap my fingers.

Why did I do that? Say a name any name!

"Delly Cartwright," Not that name! That girl drives me crazy and looks nothing like our server! Why did I say that name? "That's who it is." I'm a Moron. "I kept thinking she looked familiar as well. Then I realized she's a dead ringer for Delly."

Take the bait Katniss, just say yes or a different name, but just don't keep saying you know this girl.

"Of course, that's who I was thinking of. It must be the hair," Yes! Problem avoided!

"Something about the eyes, too," I add, so they really do think we know the twin of this girl. Are they gullible? Or will they still report Katniss?

"Oh, well. If that's all it is," says Cinna quickly "And  
yes, the cake has spirits, but all the alcohol has burned off. I ordered it especially in  
honour of your fiery debut."

That was nice of him. He obviously likes Katniss as a tribute to start of his career. He seems very nice and friendly and clever too. I hope he can make Katniss really memorable after tonight as well, that would be fantastic.

As we eat our tribute cake, we watch the opening ceremony to see how we did with the crowd. And we did brilliantly! We got loads of time on the screen and hand holding got lots of attention.

"Whose idea was the hand holding?" asks Haymitch.

"Cinna's," says Portia. Not that I was complaining.

"Just the perfect touch of rebellion," compliments Haymitch. "Very nice."

How was it a rebellion? Sure we are supposed to want to kill each other but that shouldn't mean we can't be friends. So the other couples weren't interacting but that doesn't mean we're trying to rebel.

"Tomorrow morning is the first training session. Meet me for breakfast and I'll  
tell you exactly how I want you to play it," says Haymitch to us two "Now go  
get some sleep while the grown-ups talk."

Grown up's? I really don't like that man. We walk to our corridor in silence and when we get to Katniss' room I stop. There's one thing I want to ask.

"So, Delly Cartwright, Imagine finding her look alike here."

She looks nervous, maybe she really did know that Avox girl a lot. Then I realise people still might be able to hear us.

"Have you been on the roof yet?" She shakes her head a little "Cinna showed me. You can practically see the whole city. The wind's a bit loud, though." There is no one up there too, but I figured if I added that she might either think something was up, or someone else might hear that and think something was up.

"Can we just go up?" She asks.

"Sure, come on," I say softly and begin to lead the way. When we get up there the view is absolutely magical. Lights and everywhere and the buildings are fascinating. For a minute I wonder what the Capitol citizens would be doing right now, would they be like people from the districts and be eating dinner with there families? Then I realise what's just been on T.V and there probably making bets and talking about who's going to die first.

I turn my attention back to Katniss, she looks really happy. Start the conversation off then Mellark.

… Silence. Great.

What do I say?

"I asked Cinna why they let us up here. Weren't they worried that some of the  
tributes might decide to jump right over the side?" I blurt.

"What'd he say?"

"You can't," I put my hand out and place a finger on the electric field thing; it sends a small shooting pain up my arm. "Some kind of electric field throws you  
back on the roof."

"Always worried about our safety," She made a joke! Well a sarcastic comment, but it's still pretty funny. "Do you think they're watching us now?" she asks.

"Maybe," I admit. "Come see the garden."

"We were hunting in the woods one day hidden, waiting for game," she whispers to me.

"You and your father?"

"No, my friend Gale, Suddenly all the birds stopped singing at once, except  
on, As if it was giving a warning call. And then we saw her. I'm sure it was the  
same girl. A boy was with her. Their clothes were tattered. They had dark circles  
under their eyes from no sleep. They were running as if their lives depended on  
it,"

Oh no. Not them. Anyone but them. I remember them. Not the brother and sister.

"The hovercraft appeared out of nowhere, I mean, one  
moment the sky was empty and the next it was there. It didn't make a sound, but  
they saw it. A net dropped down on the girl and carried her up, fast, so fast like  
the elevator. They shot some sort of spear through the boy. It was attached to a  
cable and they hauled him up as well. But I'm certain he was dead. We heard the  
girl scream once. The boy's name, I think. Then it was gone, the hovercraft,  
vanished into thin air. And the birds began to sing again, as if nothing had  
happened."

He died. That little boy died. They were traitors.

Oh god.

That must have been so horrible to see.

"Did they see you?"

"I don't know. We were under a shelf of rock,"

"You're shivering," I blurt out. She looks very cold. I take off my jacket and wrap it around her, being very gentle.

"They were from here?" I can't help but ask a few more questions. I can't believe they died. She nods, looking really sad and vulnerable. "Where do you suppose they were going?" They never mention anything.

"I don't know that," she says quietly. "Or why they would leave here." She adds.

"I'd leave here," I suddenly say very loudly. I don't want to think about them anymore. Wait, why did I say that? Would I? Would I really leave this place where I can do good in the games, to go back to an unloving family and a life of baking bread for rich people? I defiantly would never leave Katniss, ever. I see Katniss' face, she looks worried. I did say that quite loud. I laugh trying to break the tension. "I'd go home now if they let me. But you have to admit, the food's prime."

I pause.

"It's getting chilly. We better go in," I can still see Katniss shivering and I don't want to make her ill. I try to keep my tine light, but I just want to make one thing clear before I go to bed "Your friend Gale. He's the one who took your sister away at the reaping?"

"Yes. Do you know him?"

"Not really. I hear the girls talk about him a lot. I thought he was your cousin or  
something. You favour each other," Oh god why did I say that? Don't say yes, please don't say yes.

"No, we're not related," why would you say that? Is there something going on? What's happening between them two?

Ask.

Go on ask her.

ASK.

I nod.

"Did he come to say good-bye to you?" not that question! Actually I do want to know that.

"Yes," She says." So did your father. He brought me cookies."

My eyebrows practically shoot up at this news. What? Why would my father bring her cookies? What is he doing?

I think my fathers one of the only people to know that I like Katniss. He always talks about her, and I think he really likes the family.

"Really? Well, he likes you and your sister. I think he wishes he had a daughter instead of a houseful of boys." I explain. I really hope he didn't say anything. "He knew your mother when they were kids," I add. He used to have a massive crush on her too, but I leave that part out.

"Oh, yes. She grew up in town," and then she hands me back my jacket. "See you in the morning then."

"See you," I say and walk off down the corridor. I get dressed and flop into bed, trying to process all the information I got tonight. And to remember the little boy, who begged me for bread for him and his sister…


	7. Chapter 7

It was around the time mum started leaving me in the shop by my self for the first time. She trusted me enough not to do anything stupid with the shop now and I was happy not to have her breathing down my neck the whole time. I love to bake, so being in the shop wasn't too bad except having to deal with snobby people who came in and demanded the most expensive bread, then moaned about every last bit of it. Luckily there were only a few people who had enough money to buy the most expensive bread in our store. I've only ever had it once when some Capitol people came travelling for some kind of coal export meeting and they came into the shop and bought so much bread, for more than it was worth. We made a big profit that day, and to celebrate we got some new clothes, some long lasting food, and a few new pieces of furniture. That night we sat down and the dinner table to have the most extraordinary meal I've ever had (until now). Our meal had our most expensive bread, stew with some of Katniss' meat in it and orange juice. It was so sweet and delicious.

Anyway, but an about a week after my mum agreed to leave me alone, a small boy came into the shop He had a blue tinge to his skin and his hair had bit of green in it. You could tell straight away he was a Capitol boy, but he was so skinny and raggedy looking. I was really confused.

"Can I help you?" I asked politely. I remember thinking maybe this boy was a son of a Capitol person.

"Yes. Please." He said to the floor.

"With what?"

"I would like some bread. How much is bread?" he muttered.

"The cheapest bread we have is this one." I point at the price tag next to cheapest bread we have.

"Oh. Ok. Thank you." He went to step out the door.

"Wait!" I yell at him. "Are you ok? How much do you have?" He holds out his hand and shows me some money. I calculate hoe much he has and realise he doesn't even have enough for half of our cheapest bread.

"Why do you need the bread?" I ask him

"My sister and I are heading away and we don't have any food left. She needs to eat, she's getting really skinny, and we can't move very fast if she's weak." He blurted out. I was so shocked. Why are they 'heading away'? I ask.

"We need to get away." He said.

"Why?" I question.

"We need to get away" he repeated. I looked at him. He looked so weak and needy. His clothes were torn and he looked like he hadn't slept in a week. I opened up the bread counter and pick out a large loaf of bread. I pass it to the boy. His face lights up and he looks like a real person for the first time since he walked in. He looks at me and just stares at me.

"There you go. Make sure your sister gets lots, but you eat too OK?" I say to him, I wanted to make sure he won't give his sister all of it.

"Thank you." he looks at me with big eyes and a tear falls down his cheek. Then he runs out of the shop. I walk after him and I see a flash of red hair and two figures disappear into the forest entrance.

My mother found out that we hadn't sold that bread that day, and was very mad at me. I wouldn't tell her why the bread was gone, so she assumed I'd eaten it. I didn't get dinner that day or breakfast and lunch the next day to make up for the money that bread had cost, but I didn't really mind. Every time I got hungry I just thought of how hungry that little boy and his sister must be.

And that Avox girl must have been his sister.

But he's gone. Maybe he 's happier now.

Maybe after the games I'll see him again.


	8. Chapter 8

Sleep's almost impossible. My mind is filled with images of that little boy and his tiny face and big eyes. How his raggedy clothes were loose of his body which seemed to be just skin and bones. And how he died. He was murdered. When I think I can hear movement outside I get up and take a cold shower to wake myself up. After a while when I can feel my eyes become a bit less heavy, I turn it to hot and fiddle with some of the many, many buttons. I get out and dry myself using one of the fancy Capitol towels I've been left. It's soft and fluffy and dries me very quickly.

When I leave the bathroom I find some seemingly normal clothes laid out on the bed for me. I chuck them on and brush my hair. I'm hoping after last night, Katniss and I may be on better terms than before. My belly rumbles so I make my way to the dining room where I find Katniss eating her meal and Haymitch enters a few seconds after me.

"Good morning" I say to her as I look at her outfit. It seems to be identical to min expect a few small differences in size.

Why is something that looks so normal on me, look incredible on her?

I grab some food and find that everything is delicious and is very rich in flavour. I try to taste some of the food Katniss is eating, just because it looks nice, but some melon that she took is horrid. It's horrible, but she seems to like it.

I also notice that's she's dipping in rolls of bread into her hot chocolate that I did on the train, and I don't know if it's coincidence but it still makes me feel slightly proud.

Even if it did taste like mouldy feet.

Dipped in chocolate.

"So, let's get down to business. Training. First off, if you like, I'll coach you separately. Decide now." Haymitch announces. Coach us separately? So that my last remaining time with Katniss is cut down by loads? No thanks

"Why would you coach us separately?" Katniss asks.

"Say if you had a secret skill you might not want the other to know about,"  
says Haymitch.

I look at Katniss and she looks at me.

"I don't have any secret skills," I say quickly "And I already know what yours is, right? I mean, I've eaten enough of your squirrels." This isn't a lie, and unless Katniss has some amazing talent other than using a bow and arrow and singing, I really think it would be better if we trained together. That way I can help her with her weak spots when the games begin.

"You can coach us together," Katniss tells Haymitch and I nod, happy.

"All right, so give me some idea of what you can do," says Haymitch.

"I can't do anything," I say. I don't have any special skills, and I'm pretty bad with the outdoors. I like to be inside, drawing or painting. "Unless you count baking bread." I add

"Sorry, I don't. Katniss. I already know you're handy with a knife," says  
Haymitch.

"Not really. But I can hunt," Katniss gives a weak smile, probably remembering the times when she's done out hunting with Gale. Stupid Gale. "With a bow and arrow."

"And you're good?" asks Haymitch. Is she good? She's incredible I feel like saying.

"I'm all right," I hear Katniss say. What is she talking about? Does she want to lose? Because if Haymitch doesn't know what she can do, how can he talk her up to the sponsors?

"She's excellent," I blurt out. "My father buys her squirrels. He always  
comments on how the arrows never pierce the body. She hits every one in the  
eye. It's the same with the rabbits she sells the butcher. She can even bring down  
deer." Did that sound good? It sounded okay, even if it came out a little shaky.

"What are you doing?" Katniss asks me.

"What are you doing? If he's going to help you, he has to know what you're  
capable of. Don't underrate yourself," I reply.

"What about you? I've seen you in the market. You can lift hundred-pound bags of flour," she snaps. "Tell him that. That's not nothing." Yes it is!

"Yes, and I'm sure the arena will be full of bags of flour for me to chuck at  
people. It's not like being able to use a weapon. You know it isn't," I'm angry at her now; I'm trying to help her! Why is she getting so annoyed at me?

"He can wrestle," she turns to Haymitch. "He came in second in our school  
competition last year, only after his brother." How the hell does she know that?

"What use is that? How many times have you seen someone wrestle someone  
to death?" my voice doesn't sound like my own at all. I've never been this angry before.

"There's always hand-to-hand combat. All you need is to come up with a knife,  
and you'll at least stand a chance. If I get jumped, I'm dead!" she raises her voice at me.

"But you won't! You'll be living up in some tree eating raw squirrels and picking  
off people with arrows. You know what my mother said to me when she came to  
say good-bye, as if to cheer me up, she says maybe District Twelve will finally  
have a winner. Then I realized, she didn't mean me, she meant you!" I burst. Then realise what I've said. Why would I tell her that?

"Oh, she meant you,"

"She said, 'She's a survivor, that one.' She is," I say, every trance of angry has gone from my voice as I remember my mother's last words to me.

"But only because someone helped me." She says. She doesn't seem angry any more either. What does she mean?

She can't possibly mean when…

It was a few months after her father had died and I was working in the bakery and I heard my mother screaming at some child in the rain. Apparently the kid was going through our bins. So I went out to see who it was, and there she was. She was soaking all over and had this huge coat on. She was muddy and looked near death. Her face was so thin and her hands looked like bones. This was the first time I'd seen her since her fathers death and the fist time I realised how much she must be struggling. When my mum went inside I did too, making a promise to myself I would help her in any way I could. Then I noticed the smell of burning bread was filling the room. I looked into an oven and found two loaves of bread burnt. My mum saw too and began to yell at me, and then she slapped me. Really, really hard. She'd never hit me before, and I just stood there and then she told me to go feed them to the pigs. I walked back out into the rain and she was still there. So I began to break up pieces of bread and throw them to the pigs. I was aware my mother was watching me so I didn't do anything but throw the bread, until she went to go serve a customer. I didn't dare look at Katniss but I could see her out of the corner of my eye. She was watching me. Than without thinking I turned and threw a loaf of bread to Katniss. She face lit up. But I turned away and ran back into the bakery, worried my mum had seen.

She can't have meant that could she?

"People will help you in the arena. They'll be tripping over each other to sponsor you." I look her right in the face.

"No more than you,"

I roll my eyes at Haymitch. "She has no idea. The effect she can have."

"Well, then. Well, well, well. Katniss, there's no guarantee they'll be bows and arrows in the arena, but during your private session with the Gamemakers, show them what you can do. Until then, stay clear of archery. Are you any good at trapping?"

"I know a few basic snares," she says quietly.

"That may be significant in terms of food," says Haymitch. "And Peeta, she's  
right, never underestimate strength in the arena. Very often, physical power tilts  
the advantage to a player. In the Training Centre, they will have weights, but don't  
reveal how much you can lift in front of the other tributes. The plan's the same for  
both of you. You go to group training. Spend the time trying to learn something  
you don't know. Throw a spear. Swing a mace. Learn to tie a decent knot. Save  
showing what you're best at until your private sessions. Are we clear?" I nod and Katniss does the same.

"One last thing, in public, I want you by each other's side every minute," says  
Haymitch. What? Katniss will never agree to that!

"Every minute! It's not open for discussion! You agreed to do as I said! You will be  
together, you will appear amiable to each other. Now get out. Meet Effie at the  
elevator at ten for training."

I walk off to my room and hear Katniss' door slam really loudly.

This should be fun.


	9. Chapter 9

As soon as I go in to my room I collapse onto the bed. With everything that's happened last night I would have thought Katniss would be okay with us spending some more time together but obviously not. I get that when we're in the arena we can no longer be friends, but I thought maybe before…

No, clearly not.

The thing is last night she looked at me like she really did trust me, I felt her warming to me slowly and I figured things might be a bit different now.

At least I get to spend time with her.

Think of the positives Mellark.

I brush my teeth and wash my face before I have to go. Looks like I'll be spending the day with Katniss so I may as well make an effort.

It's almost 10 so I head out to find Effie and she's near the elevator. We say hello, but then wait in silence until Katniss arrives.

When we get down there it's terrifying. Everyone's huge and looks at me like I'm scum. The careers are all looking down at me and Katniss, probably remembering the fire. By the time we've finished being talked to; my concentration is completely focused on what looks like a weakness on the other tributes. I don't really see anything, though I do notice quite a small tribute who looks about 9. She must be 12, but I am interested on what she can do. I don't think she volunteered though.

"Where would you like to start?" I ask Katniss. She looks at me like she's forgotten I'm there at all.

"Suppose we tie some knots," She says after having a quick look around.

"Right you are," I say and quickly move to go there.

I'm amazed at how quickly Katniss could learn things. I've never seen her look so focused on something before I don't think. She looks so sweet. The instructor shows us some simple snares that Katniss has no trouble with. She even shows the instructor a snare that looks pretty fancy. Then she says he friend showed her how.

Gale.

Gale.

She's thinking about Gale, when she's going into the games with me. She's spending time with me. Not him. I bet she's thinking I'm rubbish at snares compared to Gale. I look down at my snare, it's not bad, but there's a certain lack of… professional quality. Katniss is busy chatting to the instructor so I look around. There must be something I can do to show her I'm just as good as Gale.

Then I see it. Camouflage!

**Sorry my chapters are getting shorter, but it's easier to upload them! Hope you liked this chapter and review please! **


	10. Chapter 10

I love the camouflage station, I soon forget I'm there to impress Katniss and just start mixing and painting. And if I'm honest, it felt like home. I've been feeling so frustrated since we've got here, worrying about Katniss and the games but with a brush in my hand, I just forget. My mind is completely focused on my work. I look up, remembering I'm supposed to be friends with Katniss. She watching my arm, but her expression is almost unreadable and I notices she's also peeking glances . I struggle to think of something to say.

"I do the cakes," I blurted out.

"The cakes?" She says "What cakes?"

"At home. The iced ones, for the bakery," I say. My heart hurts when I say home. Though strangely, it wouldn't feel like home without Katniss.

"It's lovely. If only you could frost someone to death," she snips. She can be quite rude sometimes.

"Don't be so superior. You can never tell what you'll find in the arena. Say it's  
actually a gigantic cake —" I try and joke but she gets annoyed before I finish.

"Say we move on,"

over the next few days I learn loads of handy stuff about how to survive in the arena, some weapon work- it turns out I'm actually ok with a knife, spears and a few other weapons. I guess Katniss was right; my strength might come in handy in the arena. She tries other weapons and is quite good with a knife but not the bow and arrow. I don't even look at the weights, because I'm sure the careers are watching us. They keep looking our way, and the little one, I'm sure she's planning on getting Katniss. She's got that evil look in her eye. She's amazing with knifes. I really hope they don't put too many in the arena, she might have a good chance of winning.

But Katniss needs to win.

It's great spending so much time with Katniss. I can spend my final days with the girl I love.

I just wish she'd love me back.


End file.
